Stir-Fried Random Ep 03: All I Want for Christmas Is…

A thanksgiving themed 'buy stuff' advertisementThanksgiving = Shopping, evidently. Anyway, since this is about the time of year when the vast population of my devoted fans around the world begin demanding to shower me with gifts and asking what kinds of gifts they should give me…this episode of Stir-Fried Random has some suggestions. Enough suggestions, in fact, that I didn’t even have room to include a Nerd Word, Emprical Observation of the Week, or Microbiology Microlecture. Therefore, while this episode will probably be slightly less interesting to the microbiology and computer-nerd focussed listeners, it should be of special interest to members of my immediate family, secret admirers, cultists who worship me as a living embodiment of divine spiffitude, and agents of the NSA, FBI, CIA, USDA, and Federal Department of Blog Enforcement who are busily profiling me. There is some other stuff though – please give it a listen, pass copies along to your friends, play it over the Public Announcement system at school, turn it into a techno-dance remix video on YouTube®, whatever.

As usual, direct download links for mp3 and ogg versions, plus <audio> tag support for those with really new browsers to listen in place, and embedded Flash-based mp3 player for everyone else who wants to listen in the browser instead of downloading and singing along during your commute or whatever.
(UPDATE 20081126: I’ve REMOVED the embedded player for now – it seems it ignores me when I tell it to wait until it’s told to before it starts playing. Autoplay annoys the heck out of me, and this seems to insist on it. The embedded player will remain gone until I get it to behave properly. Meanwhile, you can double-click or “right-click -> save as:” on the ogg or mp3 download link to get the audio files to listen to. Apologies to anyone ambushed by the unwanted auto-playing of the sound…)

Show Notes:

  • 00:00 A Message From Santa Claus
  • 00:12 Intro Music
  • 00:40 Halloween is over, and you know what that means…
  • 01:27 Some things I want for Xmas
  • (Note that I’m not limiting this list to REASONABLE things. Hey, someone out there might win the lottery or have a desire to be an independently wealthy anonymous patron…Vacuum pumps cost several hundred dollars, for example…)

  • 02:50 Gift cards AND Legislators seem to be scams a lot of the time…
  • 03:22 Another Message from Santa Claus
  • 03:40 Alferbeetagama sings!
  • 03:46 The American Cultural Specialty
  • 04:07 (He also says “West Country and Western Music”, but not living in the UK I don’t get it…)
  • 04:34 The Comet was Tempel 1
  • 06:20 Another thing I want – for making Ice Cream
  • 06:35 (Liquid Helium is extremely cold, in case you didn’t know…)
  • 07:03 Yet Another Message from Santa
  • 07:18 About Erythritol – another thing I want
  • 08:27 To be fair, Lead is for TOYS. It’s *Pesticides* that go into the food…
  • 09:14 *I* sing. Only for a second, though.
  • 09:15 Cinnamon “Stench Cones”
  • 09:42 “Freshening” vs. “Counterstench”
  • 10:02 See also this delightful cake…
  • 10:10 1,3,7-Trimethylxanthine
  • 10:13 Yet another thing I want but nobody makes…
  • 10:55 I’m not MAD, just slightly peeved…
  • (Differently Sane?)

  • 11:20 They’re only about $600,000 last time I checked
  • 11:25 I really WOULD like
  • 11:44 MALDI=”Matrix Assisted Laser Desorption Ionization”
  • 11:50 I’m afraid I sing for a couple of seconds again. Pretty much in tune, though…
  • 12:10 Wile E. Coyote is my hero
  • 12:23 Or “Earthquake Pills”
  • 12:58 Santa again…
  • 13:05 Exit Music
  • SFR003.mp3 direct download link
    SFR003.ogg direct download link

    There are a few other things I could desire as well. For example, if you can find one on clearance cheap enough, the Western Digital “MyBook World Edition” Network-Attached-Storage device is an amazing and highly-desirable thing. It’s half a terabyte of storage…PLUS a customizable tiny little built-in Linux computer to run it. WANT.

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The Author is (currently) an autodidactic student of Industrial and Environmental microbiology, who is sick of people assuming all microbiology should be medical in nature, and who would really like to be allowed to go to graduate school one of these days now that he's finished his BS in Microbiology (with a bonus AS in Chemistry). He also enjoys exploring the Big Room (the one with the really high blue ceiling and big light that tracks from one side to the other every day) and looking at its contents from unusual mental angles.

One thought on “Stir-Fried Random Ep 03: All I Want for Christmas Is…”

  1. Hey, you left it uncategorized. Just so you know. And this morning I mentioned your “stenchcone” bit to Mom. She was amused, and will likely tell you so.

    And NO, I am NOT buying you a pony. NOT YOURS.

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